I possibly have the greatest husband in all of history. This morning he needed to drop his car at the shop, and I got up early to drive him to work on my way to the office. He has this delightful habit of singing ridiculous nonsense at the top of his considerable lungs, generally along the lines of LAIRD IS GREAT to the tune of whatever was last on the nearest speaker. He’ll often add AND GAYLE SUUUUUCKS which is maybe not the best example of how great a husband he is but I promise you, it is freaking adorable. He made me breakfast and made me laugh all the way to work. I’m keeping him forever and nobody has ever been more loved, or loving, than we both are.
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Later today I get to bring supper to two more people I love, SS and SC. They’ve been away for a long, long time – first a summer in western Canada, then a sabbatical in northern France. The hole left in my life hasn’t stopped being raw. It was enough to launch me across the Atlantic for a visit (well, OK, so the attraction of Europe wasn’t a small factor). They’re in the air now, on their way back to my island. I’m somewhat anxiously looking forward to seeing them later today. I know they’re different people by now – and so am I – but I’m hopeful they’ll fit back into where they were torn loose.
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My younger brother is working on creating new life with his girlfriend, which is amazing because he will be a terrific dad. But then: there will be a tiny human on this island that has some of my DNA in it. This is causing a surreal, fascinating emotion somewhere inside of me that I can’t really explain. I have a niece and a nephew whom I love but since my older brother lives so far away, they’re basically strangers I get to see for a minute every few years. This one will be here. I will be an aunt in person.
What I would like to be is an aunt like I had – my dad’s sister, currently in a home with few memories remaining, was a delightful relative who always made sure I had art supplies and books and always wore colourful, jangly earrings. I want to be that aunt. I get to be that aunt! God, I hope I don’t screw up being that aunt.
***
| listening | sia |
| eating | husband toast |
| feeling | loved |
| loving | everyone |