I went to see Kathy again last night. It was a calmer, more relaxed evening – well, in that I had no huge epiphanies. Mostly, anyway.
We discussed my week, which was mostly gleeful and happy. I had spent the night before with Laird hanging out at dollarama and value village, having way too much fun looking at stuff; and then he hung out while I dyed my hair (red again), and he listened while I played guitar, and it was really great. She asked about my pain issues, and I said my knee and hand were OK, but my neck was killing me while I figured out the combination to my new pillows. I laid down on her comfy comfy table and was having a hard time getting enough air into my lungs for some reason. But she did a little Reiki work on my knee, and then I picked the cards for the IET.
Remember how last time I picked cards and I got guilt, heart, and powerlessness? This time I didn’t look at the cards when picking them (the last time I chose based on the faces on the back), and instead, IÂ got – guilt, heart, and powerlessness. Seriously. She had me pick another one and it was threat – especially to the back of the neck – and to work on it required the throat and lungs, and it usually affects creative people.
So the guilt out of my head was very light and she figures it’s clear. I still can’t think of a single thing I’d be guilty for because I don’t do guilt – but probably I just repress it all. I waited for the heart work with some trepidation, but it was very easy and simple; she said it was like a shadow of the last time.. andÂ I was thinking of how much it hurt last time to hear those words ‘betrayal” and “trust” and “fear of having love taken away” and “rejection”… and this time I heard the words, and I thought of Kevin and even of George which is wayyyy in the past, andÂ I brought up specific scenes of memory where I had been betrayed and rejected, and I consciously thought of letting it go, letting it all go… and then I realized: IT DIDN’T HURT ANYMORE. I got this biiiiiiiiiiiiig grin on my face andÂ I just about cried; I couldn’t say it out loud, but feeling it was really lovely.
The powerlessness I feel is strongly connected to my jewellery as a business; I feel empowered now and had three separate brilliant ideas since last night. (In related news, Laird is helping me marketing-wise.)Â I had forgotten what the powerlessness and stress were replaced with the last time, but it was Ease (and power), and she talked about opening the door and letting in soul mates of every kind so they can take me by the hand and help me do what is right for me.
Then she gave me a hand massage AND a foot massage. Heavenly! She wrote out the Healing Codes for my knee, and made me pick two power statements I have to say out loud. I forget the first one and it seems she didn’t write it down, but the second one was “I can step out to accomplish things and life will support me.”
And then we discussed some jewellery options. I’m going to prototype some chakra bracelets for about $20 in her shop, and we’re going to split the proceeds down the middle; I’m doing wholesale prices but with consignment rules, because I want us both to profit and I want the lineÂ I develop here to be indicative of both of us – sort of “our” jewellery, wherein she picks the stones and the meanings and I create the pieces.
WhenÂ I got home, my cousin came over to redeem her holiday gift certificate from her mom (my aunt), and she got an amber-coloured glass ring, and a stick pearl and amber pendant. Then we sat and talked and while nobody noticed, I sneakily made a set of amber earrings to match and gave them to her 🙂 Fun times!
Now I have to shower and eat and go to work and I don’t wanna. Wah!